For 40 years, Moses led the people of Israel in the wilderness. It was not an easy task, probably one of the toughest at that time.
So let’s build on the context here – For one, he was not part of a monarchy, like the Pharaoh who inherited the kingdom from his father. He was simply the reluctant servant who took on the task of leading the people. There was no other form of credentials that he could show for other than the 10 plagues and the Red Sea crossing.
The people looked to him as the representative of God Himself as they had no direct access to God. So every other decision from food, water, logistics, were entirely on him. The food part was a big issue as need gave way to want. To the people, it was no longer sufficient to just eat manna and survive. They wanted flavouring with the leeks and onions from Egypt. To top it off, he had to judge each and every case of squabble.
Truth be told, if you were to ask Moses back then if he knew where he was going exactly, he would only be able to give one answer – that he had to keep going in that wilderness for 40 years until an entire generation of unbelieving Israelites died as they were not worthy to inherit the promised land. All he knew was to follow a pillar of cloud by day and pillar of fire by night. He knew at certain junctures when God spoke to him in that tent of meeting that things would happen in a certain manner. And when he too disqualified himself for the promised land entry by hitting that rock instead of speaking to it for water, it was not all over for him, because in the Hebrew hall of fame, he was still recognised for his faith in Hebrews 11.
While each of us is busying our way through life, going about doing what we have been asked, tasked or purposed to do, we can sometimes have those short existential crisis moments of wondering if we are really on the right track of life. You are not alone. John the Baptist had one of those moments too when he was sentenced to prison and in the midst of that trial, questioned himself if Jesus was really the Messiah.
Dear friend, it is ok if you feel that you do not have specific directions in trying times. In the moments when we are grappling for specific answers and directions and find ourselves in a pool of vague, blurry and sometimes even conflicting ‘directions’, we need to do these 3 things:
Firstly, understand that it is ok to feel that way. You are not alone in this. The Bible characters and heroes of faith have also found themselves in this same place.
Secondly, recognise that God is not obliged to provide clarity in the present. So while we do not have the specifics, we still need to live a life of faith and know that God is working things out for us even when we do not yet see breakthrough.
Which leads us to the third point – think, speak and act in a manner that reflects what you profess.
Faith is not seen when we experience a breakthrough taking place. You do not need faith for that. You just need a pair of eyes to witness the breakthrough.
Faith is seen in the midst of bleak circumstances and we manifest faith through our thoughts, speech and actions that reflect what we profess – that He is good and is working all things for good for those who love Him and are called according to His promise.